I would like to discuss something that I think many of us deal with on a regular basis. These are of course, White People Problems. Although the name might lead you to believe this is something that affects only people who are “white”, I believe it to be more of a middle/upper/a good amount of folks in the developed world type problems. As all things in my life, I looked to urban dictionary to help define this.
As defined by the great Louis CK in his concert film “Hilarious”, these problems affect Americans in the middle to upper class. This is when your life is so amazing, that you make shit up to be upset about.
“Why do I have to choose a language on the ATM machine? This is bullshit, I shouldn’t have to do that!”
Other issues this might encompass are having your local Starbucks mess up your coffee order, or lets say, have to buy Whole Foods Brand items when they run out of the imported stuff.
In any case, I would like to try to make sure all of us, regardless of our economic level and racial preference, try not to have too many White People Problems, or as they will be hence forth known as, WPP.
As I was looking for the definition of WPP, I came across this fantastic add.
As you can clearly see, this man is a complete bad ass. He obviously became tired of the club scene at the Jersey shore, and decided that a career in kicking ass with guns was for him. It would also appear that he was able to negotiate incorporating his male-bitch goggles and his miniature blowout style haircut into the FBI uniform. For fear of crashing my computer I did not click on this link, however im willing to bet that the career training offered here is next to none, and would lead me to one of the coolest fuckin jobs in the world, brah. Please don’t be fooled though, as although this man is dressed and equipped for the Jersey shore apocalypse, im sure his life is fraught with WPP.